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Your heart skips a beat as you realize that the barn door was left open by you and the cows must have wandered out.You quickly stride over to the large barn doors in alarm, hoping to spot the cows before your landlady does. But as you step outside, you spot something unexpected, something you would never imagine you would see in your life time.Your entire village is set ablaze. The red glow warming your cheek wasn't the warmth of the sunset but the heat of the fires burning the wooden houses. --Amy Schumer"The only time a woman has a true orgasm is when she's shopping". --Joan Rivers"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch".--Jack Nicholson"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is".--Barbara Bush"Studies show that about half of Americans have sex at work. Coincidentally, that's the same half that say they are happy with their jobs".--Melanie White"You know that look women get when. The last car in line ahead of the express car wuz always a passenger car, an' all passenger cars had platforms at both ends, so the obvious thing ta do wuz ta station an armed guard on the platform over the coupler what Jubal wuz interested in an' order the guard ta shoot anybody what tried ta mess with the coupler.This last ploy worked fine fer almost three weeks, then the battle escalated ta another level. Express cars don't have platforms or door at the ends of the car, so that the only way. **************** It was the first road game of the year, and it was a 35 minute bus ride. The truck is all 77 of us get into 4 buses. I was absent the day buses were assigned so I got placed in the least crowded bus. There were a few people whom I have classes with, but mainly sophomores, a few seniors who just want to be left alone at the front of the bus. I put my bag with uniform on a seat that had a pile of others, and I take my seat in the seat across the aisle. “Hi Kevin.” I hear one of.
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